Dawn Ostroff (CW head honcho): Will resolve to ensure VERONICA MARS sees a fourth season. If you thought a Ferris Wheel outside your office was an eyesore, imagine an angry mob of Veronica and Logan shippers.
Zach Braff: Will resolve to sign on with SCRUBS for a seventh season. Sure a film career looks exciting now, but two words if we may be so bold — David Schwimmer.
Emmy Voters: Will resolve to actually take the time to watch television. Not watching TV is the only explanation for BATTLESTAR GALACTICA being continuously snubbed come Emmy time.
Betty Suarez: Will resolve to glean a few fashion tips from her co-workers at Mode. The show isn’t called ‘Clueless’ Betty.
The Walker Family (from BROTHERS & SISTERS): Will resolve to get through at least one family dinner without having it end in tears [and a bottle of wine].
The LOST writers: Will resolve to give us a plausible explanation for what the Frak is happening on our favourite mysterious island. After three seasons of nothing but questions, our patience is wearing as thin as Hurley’s waistline. Okay, fine — we’re complete suckers for this show and will sadly hang in until the very end. But seriously, give us something.
Aaron Sorkin: Will resolve to ensure STUDIO 60 is less condescending and more entertaining. Mr. Sorkin — if we wanted to learn something, we’d open the book that we’re currently using to level off our couch.
American Television Networks: Will resolve to put all of their shows up on iTunes. You can’t blame us for downloading them if you don’t provide us with a legal alternative.
Canadian Television Networks: Will resolve to get their act together and start respecting their audience. Yes I’m talking to you CTV. Whenever you decide to air the fourth season of NIP/TUCK — you’ll have one less viewer — this TV Addict’s already seen it.
American Idol: Will resolve to stop shamelessly promoting CocaCola and start promoting whatever Paula Abdul’s been drinking. We’re not exactly sure what she is on, but we’ll have what she’s having.
30 ROCK: Will resolve to stop plugging other NBC/Universal properties. That or start airing the show without commercials.
Luke & Lorelai: Will resolve to grow up, realize they’re meant for each-other and get married already.