Disappointed by DEXTER: Resistance is Futile

To paraphrase THE SIMPSON’S uber TV critic Comic Book Guy, “Worst Episode Ever!”

Okay, perhaps that’s a bit of an overstatement. But truth be told, last night’s installment of DEXTER was incredibly disappointing. Here’s why:

1. Are we seriously to believe that 160 pound Dexter Morgan could so easily subdue an armed and dangerous lethal weapon like Sgt. Doakes?

2. When Dexter asked Doakes how he found his little hiding spot, Doakes explained that he simply planted a GPS device on his boat. If that’s the case, why did Doakes waste all that time following Dexter throughout the season’s first few episodes? Why not use a GPS device?

3. The writer’s employed my television pet peeve β€” one that’s usually reserved for the likes of Jack Bauer on 24. When Doakes was conversing with LaGuerta on a cell phone, he wouldn’t reveal that he was secretly tracking Dexter. I mean HELLO!!! Shouldn’t the first words out of Doakes’ mouth have been, “By the way, you should probably know that Dexter Morgan is the Bay Harbour Butcher!”

4. Unless the writer’s have one helluva rabbit up their sleeve [and they very well may have one!] β€” Sgt. Doakes is all but dead. Which means season three of DEXTER just got far less interesting. Just ask JJ Abrams how ALIAS did without the brilliant dynamic between Sydney, SpyDaddy Jack Bristow and SpyMommy Irina Derevko.

5. Keith Carradine’s gratuitous butt shot. Was it really necessary? If we want to see old people naked, we’ll flip over to HBO’s TELL ME YOU LOVE ME.

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  • jacki

    Even a “disappointing” episode of Dexter is better than most any other show out there!

  • I completely agree! Still loved it…. but I critique because I love!

  • jacki

    Sorry, I should have mentioned that I’m all for the critiquing of my favorite shows…constant gushing does get old. I just wanted to give a little love to my favorite serial killer. πŸ™‚

    Your points are all very valid, even though I didn’t even realize most of them during last night’s show. (And I thankfully must have turned away from the TV set during the butt shot, as I missed that completely.)

    I’m interested to see how Dexter will explain the bullet wound in his leg…

  • nono the bean

    as far as the not telling to laguerta that dexter is the killer, we can assume that sergent doakes doesn’t want anyone to catch dexter but him, as it happens at the end of the episode.

  • JAmes

    Even though Dexter may be in the midst of jumping the shark there may be some explanations to your reasons why you issues with the show.

    1. Even though Dexter is a mere 160 pounds to Sgt Doakes +200lbs. He is well versed in advanced Jiujustu which Doakes did happen to call him out on during an earlier episode where he discovered that Dexter was an “addict”. Some elements of Jiujutsu does involve using your opponent’s own momentum to help subdue him, Furthermore Dexter has always used the element of surprise to subdue his victims and Doakes backing him into a corner and reacting was somewhat the same thing. I’m not saying that our favourite serial killer could take down the sarge in a UFC match but in this instance he did catch him off guard and outdid him in a mind game….so far,

    2. About the GPS thing, you got me there my friend. If Sgt Doakes was smart enough to work in the special forces, he would have been smart enough to use the GPS. Why the writers make him out to be a dumb brute I don’t know why but I guess we’ll have to ask them after the strike.

    3 I think the reason why Doakes was tracking Dexter secretly was because he already expressed his suspicions about Dexter to everyone but his sister and would look like an idiot without sound proof. Until SE2EP08 He didn’t have any solid proof. He was already reprimanded more than twice for insubordinate behaviour and if anyone in the department filed another formal complaint against him, that’s strike 3 and no questions asked will be suspended pending Internal Affairs inevstigation in which he was in episode 7 of this season.

    4. I could be totally wrong because I just remembered that I did not see the episode that aired yesterday on November 25th, for which I feel like an ass and I’m sorryI even opened my big mouth:/

    5.Not looking forward to Keith Carradine’s buttshot.

  • tom

    i disagree with you, i thought the last episode was excellent and entertaining, but that’s why we have opinions

  • CC

    Totally agrew with # 5

    But, I didnt think the episode was THAT bad. No show can be perfect, you have to overlook some loopholes the writers forgot and focus on the good. Because there sure is a lot of good.
    I was really confused and shocked at the end when he captured Doakes. How will he frame him now?!
    I would have enjoyed him killing Lila more than Doakes, I actually feel bad for him!

  • 1. Dexter is a sociopath that has killed many before and has little or no fear and Doakes himself has stated that Dexter has taken advanced martial arts classes in college.
    2. He could have used a GPS all the time. Who knows. Besides he could have decided to use it after the facts. Tracking a boat is harder to track a car on land.
    3. Doakes had been revealed as delusional and paranoid in the previous episode by LaGuerta. Saying that would have only compounded the issue, not gotten him any brownie points.
    4. That’s called a CLIFFHANGER from HELL
    5. One buttshot, get over it πŸ˜›

  • Alyssa

    Did Doakes say when he put the GSP in? He could have just done it as recently as right after he found the slides. Before he was tracking Dex by following him which means he would know when Dex was going on the docks. Anyway, even if he did have the GSP in before, he could have been tracking him when he was on the boat but that isn’t proof of anything. Oooooh creepy blood guy fishes! In Miami!

    I have never liked the character of Doakes. He is so completely one note and annoying. The only time Doakes got close to having layers was when he had his tiny crush on Deb. In the future, if Doakes finds himself dead meat, we can have an intelligent opposition who has more than one emotion (hint: not the constant stink eye.)

  • Sheindie

    A good butt shot of a well built middle-aged man.
    Dexter knows jujitsu and other martial arts. It’s an
    Engrossing, entertaining, well written, well acted show that packs more of a punch in 50 minutes than most shows pack in 50 weeks!!!!!

  • c.t.

    Wow, I couldn’t disagree with you more. I thought this was yet another fantastic episode of a series that is on a real roll this season. My only real complaint is the fact that had they made Doakes even a tad-bit likeable over the course of the past two years, we’d find ourselves in a much more interesting spot from a moral ambiguity point of view. Instead, I just want Doakes – the only one-dimensional character on the show – dead. As for your other complaints… I’m afraid they just seem incredibly nit-picky to me. Doakes explained that he didn’t want to say Dexter was the serial killer… he didn’t want to put her in the position of having to defend him without proof. Given recent events, that made perfect sense to me. And it seemed to me that he probably put the gps on dexter’s boat for one of two reasons: either because out on the water was the one place he couldn’t easily follow Dexter, or he put the gps on the boat after being fooled by Dexter with the whole fake AA thing.

  • ChrisK

    My 2 cents: Doakes said he found him with a GPS Tap not a GPS device planted on the boat. Most Ocean going boats already have GPS computers for safety and easy navigation. I understood Doakes’ comment as using his CIA contacts, which he just started to do after finding the slides, to tap into Dexter’s GPS navicomp.

    In regard to the struggle: Sociopaths do not have the fear normal people do of threats. Jujitsu as noted above – once grappling their sizes are not different enough to make a difference, it would be technique, skill and opportunity. Besides, if Doakes couldn’t be overcome by Dexter, the series would end in this episode.

    The phone thing. Doakes already looks wacko when it comes to accusing Dexter of things, but seriously, in real life the name would be the first thing out of his mouth. I would think if you were to question the realistic actions of people the logical question would be, why didn’t Doakes just give the slides to his Lt best friend and explain what he had found. She would not have discounted him with a box of blood samples.

    But hey, all these fun twists and plot points are all a part of creating suspense. I for one, certainly can’t wait till next episode.

    Maybe Dexter’s story is Doakes snatched him at gun point out through the window, made Dexter drive them out to the cabin in his boat and was going to butcher him. Dexter cuts off his own foot to play the victim.

  • Aileen

    You should head over to the televisionwithoutpity forums sometime, TVaddict…most of the time your critiques have already come up there and people have already given pretty good explanations. Although the comments to this post have been pretty good so far.

    On the Doakes v. Dexter thing, one of the reasons that Dexter won is that Doakes was just a tad freaked out and Dexter went very cold very quickly. That could have given Dexter the slight advantage that he needed. Plus, as people have already pointed out, Dexter IS a trained martial artist. AND he’s dealt with taking out larger people before in his killings.

  • wiikness

    I so disagree I cant even tell you how much.. last ep was seriously aweseome. And the points you list are all easily contradicted, like we’ve seen in the previous posts. allthough i like to add this:

    3. No. he wasnt 100% sure. And since he’s been terrorising dexter for the last couple of months LaGuerta would never believe a crazy statement like “dexter is the killer”, no way. He had to prove it first

  • brian

    I really like the show too but I gotta agree with the original poster.

    1) While Dexter may know jiujitsu, I didn’t see any jiujitsu in that scene. I saw a guy tackle a Special Forces dude while in handcuffs, fall off the dock into the water and miraculously get his handcuffs around Doakes’ neck. No chance, no way.

    2) The GPS thing is just the latest in the screwy aspects of the story. How come Lundy never says “Uh, well the killer seems to be someone who works here. Who here owns a boat?” Seems he would get a shorter list pretty quickly that way (unless all Miami cops have a fancy boat costing more than most cars).

    3) Yep – “I didn’t do it but Dexter Morgan did. In fact, if you check the second murder victim disappeared when I was at the police academy in Atlanta and the fifth disappeared on my honeymoon in Barbados and the sixteenth disppeared when I was in the hospital with a gunshot wound…”

    4) No matter how you slice it (hee-hee), Season 3 of Dexter is going to be pushing the credulity envelope a bit.

    5) How could I have missed that? Must be some psychological problem. However, having a very attractive middle-aged butt myself, I find all these derogatory comments about middle-aged butts to be highly offensive.

    Some of my problems with the show:

    1) The whole recoveryof the bodies in Bay Harbor bugs me. Check out the water depths off Miami: http://www.ngdc.noaa.gov/mgg/coastal/grddas03/html/gna26080.htm
    All Dexter had to do was keep going a few miles and he would dump the bodies in a thousand meters of water where no scuba diver is ever going…

    2) So Dexter climbs out his window and gets in his boat and finds his way to some remote location in the Everglades. I guess Dexter knows the Everglades pretty well. I would have trouble driving my car back there, to say nothing of doing it by boat.

    3) That whole business of killing his mother’s killer is totally risky and stupid. Particularly when the crazy g/f knows about it.

    4) So after Dexter chainsaws someone, how does he get cleaned up? He would have blood all over him – his hair would be covered. Did he jump in the water in the Everglades before seeing his g/f or does he drive home covered with blood?

    5) When Dexter lugs those bodies from his car to his boat, does nobody see him? If I had a boat at a marina and regularly saw someone load a couple of hundred pounds of Heftys into it, I would be suspicious. Then when I heard on the news that they found a bunch of bodies in Heftys. Oh, and the police analyze the rocks but don’t think to call other boat owners at those marinas and ask if they’ve ever seen anyone dragging bodies in Heftys to their boats.

    I like this show but it’s just not credible. It’s as bad as 24 as the original poster suggested.

  • Angel

    Re: The GPS thing. Doakes following Dexter wasn’t just about knowing were he was, it was about intimidation. He could have attempted to follow Dexter in secret, but instead he always made sure Dexter knew he was there. It was all to get under Dexter’s skin, which it kinda did.

  • Reading the posts above, did I miss something? Is Dexter a reality show about a serial killer (you never know these days) or a fictional television show? Someone confirm please.

    The episode was awesome! Dexter’s thoughts on the ride to the police station and being confronted with his box was great television.

  • Josh

    i read this article before i watched it and when i finally did i saw the reasons you listed above. And while they were sort of big the episode as a whole was still good and i was still on the edge of my seat and cant wait to see how it pans out next week

  • Martine

    I am usually very critical of plot failure, but this is really not working for me. Yes, Dexter could very easily subdue Doakes. Doakes wasn’t expecting Dexter to fight back, and attacked him straight on. They are roughly the same size, with Dexter looking more fit then Doakes. So Im not sure why you are saying Michael hall, who looks to be around 225 is 160 lbs. They are both lethal, I suppose, but obviously Dexter fights more often. As for why Doakes sisn’t tell anyone two simple reasons. he had already tried to warn people about Dexter and no one listened. Also he is the type to rely on himself. As for why the GPS it was BECAUSE he was told not to tail Dexter any more by LeGuardia. So your points make no sense to me.

  • Martine

    Sorry for the spelling/grammar errors, this keyboard sucks.

  • Martine

    I looked it up. Erik King is 5’10” weight 185lb. Michael C Hall is 6′ even and weight 195lb. Just to be accurate. Its tough to judge the height of folks on screen, huh? I really did think they would both be a bit over 200lbs too. I guess that thing about the camera adding 10lb is true. Neither of them is very big.