Am I alone in thinking that the GOSSIP GIRL storylines involving the adults tend to be more interesting than those of our central teens? Sure, the kids get the good lines (“I don’t speak Ukranian, but I do speak envelope of cash, and he understood me perfectly.”) but they don’t always click as real human beings. Frankly, I might just be wishing that the characters were as well-defined as they are in the books upon which the series is based. That said, I have to admit that Ed Westwick’s Chuck Bass is one of the most deliciously vile creatures to slither onto the TV screen in ages. Far and away the best line of the night was young Eric intoning to his sis, “Mom looks about as happy as grandma at last call.” Speaking of whom, bring back CeCe, pronto! I miss the old gal!
I really loved LAW & ORDER: GOSSIP GIRL DIVISION this week. I mean, the beautiful, blonde rich girl murdered by the brunette socialite whose world she threatened to rock? It was pretty hard not to think about S and B and the rest of their Upper East Side co-horts, especially given the promos for the real GOSSIP GIRL which have been running for weeks and made it seem as if someone was gonna bite the bullet. This was the SVU that I once knew and loved… fun story, great actors and absolutely no personal info about the detectives. The L&O mothership, meanwhile, didn’t thrill me with its season premiere. First of all, two separate episodes does not make for a “two-hour premiere!” Then again, the first hour was so yawn-inducing that I’m glad it didn’t go on for 120 minutes (although it seemed twice that). Is it really the best idea for a show which once prided itself on refusing to get personal where its leads are concerned to kick off the season delving into the personal issues of new cop Jeremy Sisto? Worse, the plot was yet another retread of the tried-(or should I say tired) and true assisted suicide storyline the show has trotted out time and again. The second hour’s story was more interesting, although it was amazing how quiet Manhattan seemed during the blackout which played a crucial role in the unfolding drama, and they relied on yet another overused plot device by having the earnest attorney tell the cops to go ahead and execute a search warrant he hadn’t actually obtained. Wake me when they run out of new episodes and start rerunning the classics.
Why do bad people keep on winning? I’m tempted to quit watching THE AMAZING RACE now that Kynt and Vixen — aka the good-hearted goths — have been eliminated, especially since they lost to Nate and Jen. Nate’s got a bit of a temper, but who can blame him given the nasty piece of work he’s teamed up with. These two take the fun out of dysfunctional.
There’s little that pisses me off more than promos which give away crucial details. And that’s exactly what happened at the end of last week’s CROWNED. Thanks to the scenes for this week’s episode, I knew when the ladies went to the desashing ceremony (and really, who ever imagined I’d be writing a sentence containing those words!) who’d be having those ginormous scissors thrust toward their midsections. While the network hadn’t shown the faces of the unlucky ladies, they did show the distinctive color of the dresses. And the end of this week’s episode did the exact same thing. Two-thirds of the fun here is in guessing who’se going to go home, so why on God’s green earth would the network give away the goodies? Meanwhile, I’ve been rooting for Hollis and her mom from the beginning, but it became even more obvious that she’s beautiful inside and out when, after being called upon to desash her pals, she refused to cut the ribbons, insisting the women deserved to take them home. Until those nasty judges insisted she snip the sashes, that is, because heaven forbid anybody be allowed to walk away from a show like this with their dignity in tact.
In an oh-so-shocking (not) development, MTV has announced that a “broken hearted” Tila Tequila will somehow pick up the pieces and once again search for love. That’s right, she’s going to take another SHOT AT LOVE. As much as I loved the first season, I knew that winner Bobby would be cast aside the second the network realized just how great the ratings were. Oh, and one of the first season’s most memorable contestants, walking Italian stereotype Dominico, is getting his own show as well. What do you want to bet Tila will put in an appearance? Sorry, but Dominico was amusing as a secondary character, but nobody has any interest in watching him find love. Will I tune in to the pilot? You bet… if only to report back to all of you. Am I proud of that fact? Not in the least.