Dispatches From The Couch: Hangerless Cliff Ahead!

Thank you, LOST, for showing every other show on television how to do a cliffhanger. Because frankly, until last night, I was worried that America would have nothing to talk about all summer. Heaven knows pretty much every other show I watch had less-than-buzzworthy endings.

Am I really supposed to get excited about the fact that five years down the road, DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES’ Susan is making out with the guy from QUEER AS FOLK? (Way to waste a gimmick that was already done better by LOST.) Or that GOSSIP GIRL’s Chuck went back to his wicked ways after having spent about four minutes devoted to Blair? And don’t get me started on the non-cliffhanger that was Meredith and Derek’s reunion on GREY’S ANATOMY.

Even SUPERNATURAL – aka the show y’all changed my mind about – didn’t have the kick-ass finale I was hoping for. Yes, it was good, but… well, it ain’t like we don’t know that Sam is gonna rescue Dean from hell!

And one of the only other cliffhangers worth talking about – “Who was on the other end of the phone that ONE TREE HILL’s Lucas dialed? – was a let down thanks to the fact we’d already seen the big moment play out (endlessly) in promos!

At least CRIMINAL MINDS and ER had the decency to leave us with the burning question of “who will die?” after each ended with fiery explosions. But at this point, does anybody really care who dies on ER?

Come fall, when the execs are sitting around wondering why the numbers are down for returning shows, they can place the blame squarely on the writers who, after striking for weeks on end, came back to a shortened season which they apparently decided wasn’t worth getting worked up over.

In essence, the scribes wrote the season off.

Yes, I expect a lot from a cliffhanger. I’m a product of the “Who shot JR?” days. But this year’s batch seemed particularly yawn-inducing. There wasn’t a “Holy crap, Vaughn told Sidney he wasn’t who she thinks he is right before that car hit!” or a “Who the heck is The Carver?” in the bunch. I would have settled for a “Who Shot Mr. Burns?”

But this summer, it looks like we’ll have to look elsewhere for topics of conversation. Um… read any good books lately?

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  • http://tapeworthy.blogspot.com Vance

    I actually liked some of the other cliffhangers or noncliffhanging endings but Lost. Was. CRAMAZING!

    Sorry, I had to start the show late due to roomies so couldn’t join the live blog and hear spoilers (and I’m so glad I’ve avoided all of them). Cause the experience was just spectacular. Those screams and gasps you heard? That was me from Ossington and Queen.

  • CT


    Cramazing? Hello, my new favorite word.
    Last night’s episode was filled with SO many amazing moments, both big and small. My favorite “big” moment? Sun reacting to the explosion. if Yunjin Kim doesn’t get an Emmy nod, I might have to do a little blowin’-stuff-up myself. As for the smaller moments, I loved Rose callin’ out Miles.

  • Common Sense

    Hee hee. Lucas’s phone call as a “cliffhanger?” Tee hee.

    Like anyone freakin’ cares. And those who DO really need a life.

    LOST…I’m just speechless.

  • http://www.couchslobs.com bertas

    Brain fry I agree :) The wicked thing about Lost writers is that even though they did give us answers to some question (damn and blast that coffin it was in the back of my mind during the whole season) still the cliffhanger is perfect to keep us going back for more.
    It is a delicate balance and I guess they did learn their lesson last season.
    Perhaps since I also am a product of the JR days like yourself what I really am is a snobby little TV brat and expect to be vowed :)

  • CT

    Common Sense: I freely admit that I need to get a life. If you happen to know where I can get one, please drop me a line!

  • Tash

    How do you know Sam is going to rescue Dean ?

  • SimplyKimberly

    I watched. I clung to the edge of my seat. And my cranial matter was splattered all over my living room wall. Tonight I am giving it another go to catch those moments I missed when I was screaming “Breathe Desmond!” or “Turn the Frakking Helicopter Around and Get Jin – He’s Right There, He’s Right There”!

    I swear that this show just keeps getting better and better. And Yunjin Kim definitely not only deserves any Emmy nod, but should clearly walk away with the statue because damn, that woman put me through the wringer with her grief.

    And Big Damn Hero James Ford just made me so proud. He’s definitely the one that has grown the most in all the time spent on the island.

  • Sonia

    I gotta DISAGREE about the lost finale

    It was NOT a cliffhanger…loved the entire episode and HATED the
    “supposed” cliffhanger (which kinda happened with all the finales this year…do I care that locke was in teh coffin…YAWN!!!

    NOT EVEN ONE SHOW (Gossip Girl, the Office, Ugly Betty, Grey’s Anatomy, Lost had a damn cliffhanger…WTF is going on???

  • ct

    Tash: Um… seriously? Because that’s the whole point of this show: The connection the brothers have. The sacrifices they make for one another. Nobody seriously thinks that Dean will remain in hell. Oh, and then there’s the fact that Kripke has already gone on record saying that Dean will come back from hell and next season will focus on finding out what happened to him while he was there (hello, Buffy rip-off!)

    SONIA: I’m afraid I have to respectuflly disagree. The whole point of a cliffhanger is to leave us wondering one of two things: 1) What happens next? or 2) How the heck did we get to that point? The LOST finale did both. It left us wondering what happens next by answering some questions and raising a million more. And it left us wondering “How did we get to that point?” by leaving us to wonder how Locke died. If that’s not a great cliffhanger, I don’t know what is!