Today’s TV Addict Top 5: Top 5 Stupefying Moments From Last Night’s Premiere of THE BACHELOR

Brad’s shock.
Seriously, dude? You didn’t think the two women you dumped during the final episode last time around would be trotted out? Have you never seen a reality show… including the one that made you the most hated bachelor in America?

The vampire chick.
Seriously, dude? How did you not immediately notice that the chick who called you “delicious” was sporting fangs? 

Nobody walked out.
Seriously, ladies? Not a single one of you walked out upon finding out you’d been saddled with Brad? You deserve whatever comes down the road. 

The tears.
Seriously, ladies? You’re gonna cry because you didn’t get a rose the very first night from a guy you didn’t know yesterday? Guess it’s a good thing you didn’t make it to the end and get dumped then or you’d be downright suicidal. 

Brad’s return itself.
Seriously, dude? You spent the past three years in therapy and the shrink didn’t at some point say, “You know, trying to find love on a television show filled with women of questionable sanity let alone motives is probably not the wisest move.”

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  • Nick

    Seriously, dude? You sat thru that garbage? (ha ha) Funny thing is, besides Brad being a jerk–seriously, who would want to *marry* him?!–he’s not good-looking, either. If viewers don’t see thru ABC’s thinly-veiled attempt to manipulate them with nonsensical “drama,” then there’s just no hope for you at all, man.