Biggest Surprise: Despite the fact that the first half of SHAMELESS’ season had us wishing those poor Gallagher kids were more of a “Party of 6,” not-quite-father-of-the-year-candidate Frank deserves some serious credit for owning up to sleeping with son Lip’s not-quite-girlfriend Karen by taking his “golden shower” like a man.
Best Blowoff: After Ina Garten — aka the Barefoot Contessa — got herself in hot water by denying a 6-year-old’s Make-A-Wish request, the kid’s dad turned the tables on her by saying “thanks, but no thanks” when she realized the error of her ways. Personally, we think cancer patient Enzo made a great choice in trading the Contessa for a swim with dolphins!
Creepiest Practical Joke Ever: While his housemate was away, a Reddit user — Deluxe810 — transformed his roomie’s sleep space into a kill room like those used by DEXTER Morgan.
Creepiest Guest Appearance of the Week: Elizabeth Mitchell’s terrifying turn as a piano teacher accused of raping and killing a young girl on Wednesday’s LAW & ORDER: SVU may have solidified the talented actress’s chances at an outshining guest actor Emmy, but it gave us the willies.
Worst Export: Will anyone really be able to blame Canada when they declare war upon the United States after THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF TORONTO hits the airwaves?
Oddest Guest Gig: Wayne Brady looked both uncomfortable and confused while judging the final five contestants on RUPAUL’S DRAG RACE.
When Stunt Casting Goes Awry: Kourtney Kardashian’s appearance on ONE LIFE TO LIVE proved why acting should be left to professionals.
Quote Of The Week: “Snooki is an old Italian word for talentless slut,” said Steven Schirripa on CONAN.
Proof We’re All Doomed: MTV got its highest ratings in five years thanks to the season finale of JERSEY SHORE.
Reason #4234 We Love Twitter: Comes LOST executive producer @damonlindelof’s honest reaction to this week’s MAD MEN negations between AMC, Lionsgate and creator Matthew Weiner, “Not that I’m sour grapes, but TEN MILLION DOLLARS a year for 13 episodes of a single show seems pretty fair, no? #SOURGRAPES”
Reason #4235: Comes @sutterink’s follow up, “You can’t ask a network for 10 million, then bitch when they want to expand their ad revenue source. Whore or saint, pick one.”
Most Best Reason To Throw Your Cowboy Hat In The Air And Shout Yeehaw: FX renewed modern western JUSTIFIED for a third season.
The Lame Attempt To Get Publicity For A Failed Show Award Goes To…: Bravo, who this week announced that THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF MIAMI’s reunion show would be a live broadcast.
Most Disturbing Political Development: Does anybody really think that Donald Trump is going to run for president? No. So why is the coif-challenged blowhard being treated as a serious contender by news outlets and allowed to continue beating the birther drum, much to the not-so- secret delight of the GOP?
Bravo Series We’re Most Looking Forward To: PROJECT RUNWAY alum Chris March — known for his outrageous designs and over-the-top style — will headline MAD FASHION, in which his team develops flamboyant outfits for big-name clients.
Conspiracy of the Week: Is it just us, or did anyone else scream “product placement” following AMERICAN DAD’s completely bizarre and out of place riff on Major League Baseball that was perfectly timed to coincided with the start of the MLB season?