Best Fight: THE OFFICE’s Pam and Jim had an argument that was about as real and painful as they get… and it led to us finally meeting one of the people behind the ubiquitous cameras that have been following the Dunder-Miflin staffers since the beginning.
Oddest Feud: Dustin Hoffman got into a tussle with the folks at PETA over the axing of LUCK, making this the least timely story since Oprah’s interview with Lance Armstrong.
Reason #1254 Why We’re Going to Miss 30 ROCK: Said Liz Lemon on 30 ROCK, “DVR at 98%, but I’m just never in the mood to watch Treme!”
Most Talked About Interview: Katie Couric beat everyone else to the punch by landing Manti “Catfish” T’eo.
Best Investment: Thanks to the professional over-reactors at the Parents Television Council, Mercedes-Benz has already gotten its moneys worth out of their Super Bowl ad featuring Kate Upton. When will they get that there really is no such thing as bad publicity?
The Force is Strong with This One: Mere months after Disney announced plans to purchase LucasFilm, Star Wars fanboys Adam Horowitz and Eddy Kitsis managed to include the movie’s iconic theme as a Storybrooke character’s ringtone! And speaking of LucasFilm…
JJ. ABRAMS is directing the New Star Wars!!! Paging Jennifer Garner, Keri Russell, Joshua Jackson and Josh Holloway… Clear Your Schedules!
Most Annoying Reality Star: Move over, Snooki. VANDERPUMP RULES’ Stassi has officially become the character we love to hate… without the love.
Mystery We Can’t Wait To Solve: When DALLAS buries J.R. Ewing this spring, it’ll kick off a storyline revolving around the character’s murder.
Best Gross-Out: Thanks to Arizona’s attempts to alleviate the phantom pain of her amputated limb, GREY’S ANATOMY gave us some of the goriest scenes this side of THE WALKING DEAD.
Trainwreck We’ll Never Get To Witness: RadarOnline.com reported that Lindsay Lohan’s team feared she’d freak under the pressure of doing DANCING WITH THE STARS live.
What’s Wrong With Us As A People: In a nutshell? The day after President Obama’s inauguration, the only thing people could talk about was whether or not Beyonce was lip-syncing.
Most In Need Of A New Catchphrase: “Winning!” definitely didn’t apply to the second season debut of Charlie Sheen’s ANGER MANAGEMENT, which was down over 65 percent from the season one premiere.
Coolest Reversal Of Fortune: In the unexpectedly emotional finale, AMERICAN HORROR STORY turned former sadist Sister Jude into a shockingly sympathetic figure.
Most Disproved Title: Apparently, Parker Lewis can, in fact, lose. Or at least former portrayer Corin Nemec can. This week, he shattered his leg in a boating accident.
Best Ad For An Unwatchable Show: Playing on its history of featuring wildly unstable young women, THE BACHELOR created an add around current bad girl Tierra being “Tierra-ble.”
Least Realistic Pregnancy: GENERAL HOSPITAL’s surrogate mom Maxie was implanted easier than most people make scrambled eggs. Then, about five minutes after miscarrying the baby she was carrying for gal pal Lulu, got pregnant again following a romp with her ex! Talk about your fertile Myrtle!
Reason Property Values Are Going Down: NEIGHBORS is still on the air but THE B IN APT. 23 has been axed.
Proof That Good Things Happen To Bad People: Heidi and Spencer Pratt have made it ot the finale of CELEBRITY BIG BROTHER and could actually win.
Most Overdue Recognition: The television Hall Of Fame at last inducted Philo T. Farnsworth. Who? Why, only the guy who actually invented the very thing without which there wouldn’t be a hall… TV.