Best Return: The second REVENGE’s Lydia emerged from the shadows, things in the Hamptons got a whole lot more interesting!

Grossest Exploitation: Of all the people whose lives are threatened by extreme alcoholism, DR. PHIL trotted out SURVIVOR winner Todd Herzog… and made sure to include not only another SURVIVOR alum but one of the folks from THE DOCTORS.

Biggest Binge: Japanese TV will air 234 NCIS episodes in a 10-day marathon designed to promote Season 11 and, as an aside, earn a Guiness World Record.

Most Entertaining Dinner: THE YOUNG & THE RESTLESS’ Nikki gathered her family together for a meal which included flaring tempers, flying fists and the revelation of her secret son! Something tells us they won’t be gathering for a Thanksgiving feast!

Best Nickname: THE VAMPIRE DIARIES’ Damon took to calling Elena}s latest doppelganger “Crazy Pants.”

Most Pointless Shock: Seeing Mama Pope open a vein with her teeth was shocking, but pretty unnecessary. (We did, however, love when the SCANDAL cray cray later that a pic of daughter Olivia was so cute, “You just wanna eat her!”)

Quickest Cancellation: Toronto’s crack-smoking, drunken stupor having, tantrum-throwing Mayor, Rob Ford, got a TV series called FORD NATION… which was axed after one episode.

Most Surprising Confession: John Bowman admitted to TV Guide that he’s kinda hoping REVENGE’s Daniel will die by season’s end.

Sudsiest Programming Move: Having had success with their same-day airings of THE YOUNG & THE RESTLESS, The TV Guide Network (or TVGN) announced they will next month begin running episodes of THE BOLD & THE BEAUTIFUL as well!

Best Calling-Out: Bill Cosby took THE DAILY SHOW’s Jon Stewart to task for his excessive use of profanity and teaching people that bad words are funny. Cosby added that where he came from, “when people cursed, the next thing that was gonna happen was someone was gonna hit you!”

Most Traumatized Couple: GENERAL HOSPITAL’s Lulu had to deal with hubby Dante revealing she’d committed perjury during a custody battle and their subsequent loss of daughter Connie!

Who We’re Blaming: Ratings for THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF BEVERLY HILLS have taken a huge hit this season, and we’re lookin’ at you, Carlton, as being the reason! (Please don’t put a spell on us!)

Least Likely To “Get Over It”: Former WALKING DEAD showrunner Frank Darabont made it pretty clear to Rolling Stone that the odds of him ever watching another episode of the zombiefest are right up there with Rush Limbaugh and President Obama forming a mutual admiration society.

Harshest Cut: With tears streaming down her face, SURVIVOR’s Ciera voted mom Laura off the island.

Coolest Reveal: PERSON OF INTEREST executive producer Greg Plageman revealed to TVLine’s Matt Mitovich that the unexpected kiss between John and Joss was improvised by the actors, “because in that moment, they both felt it.”

The Try, Try Again Award Goes To… : POWER, an upcoming offering from Starz set in a New York City nightclub. Quick, name the last successful series that was set in or revolved around a similar venue. THE PLAYBOY CLUB? Gone. ONE LIFE TO LIVE’s reboot? History. And THE BAD GIRLS CLUB isn’t an actual, you know, nightclub!

Oddest Name-Dropping: A conservative group is attacking an Idaho Congressman as being an “Alec Baldwin Republican.” Something tells us they don’t mean he has an enviable ability to bounce back from bad publicity.

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