Fall TV Preview: THE MYSTERIES OF LAURA

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Starring: Debra Messing (“Will & Grace,” “Smash”), Josh Lucas (“The Firm”), Laz Alonso (“Deception”) and Janina Gavankar (“True Blood”)

Genre: One-hour comedy-drama

Premiere Date: Sneak Preview – Wednesday, September 17, 10 p.m. / Regular Time Period Premiere – Wednesday, September 24, 8 p.m., NBC (CTV in Canada)

Direct Competition: “Survivor” (CBS), “Hell’s Kitchen” (Fox), “The Middle”/”The Goldbergs” (ABC), “Arrow” (CW)

Premise (in 140 characters or less): Laura Diamond is a cop… and a mother. How does she do it!?

Initial Reaction: I’ve never seen a pilot so unintentionally funny. “The Mysteries of Laura” is a dramedy, but whenever it actually generates a laugh, it’s not asking for it.

Conclusion: I could go on and tell you that, yes, “Laura” is as bad as it looks, or I can run off a list of the pilot’s “finest” moments.

Laura is approached by her captain about serious police business:
“What do you have on tap for tonight,” he asks.

“Laundry, a bath and a chilled martini. Why?”

Laura finds a dead body, immediately thinks of her kids’ nutrition:

“I’m out of oatmeal and Target closed at 11. What am I supposed to serve at breakfast?”

An elderly woman gets a kick out of the fact that Laura is a female detective, “like Rizzoli.”

On being a cop… and a mother:

“I have to find a preschool for criminals. And while I’m on it, solve a murder case.”

AND WHILE SHE’S ON IT?!

Still being a cop… and a mother:

“I’m just a mother with a shiny badge, a loaded gun and very little patience.”

If only Target was open 24 hours, amirite?

No one’s questioning that a woman, in 2014, can be both great at her job and great at being a mother. As a result, not only is the show a mess, but it’s a dated mess. It plays out as the ultimate parody, and I can’t help but think we’re all being punk’d. If not, then no one involved realizes how their show plays to an audience, and that’s never a good sign.

Watch Live, DVR or Skip?: Skip it.

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  • Retired military

    Absolutely HORRID. I lasted 10 min and regretted every second.