TWO AND A HALF MEN Recap: An Elephant in the Room

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Season 12 | Episode 1 | “The Ol’ Mexican Spinach” | Aired Oct 30, 2014

“Two and a Half Men” might be coming to an end, but it has only just begun to tackle its most controversial storyline yet.

In “The Ol’ Mexican Spinach,” everyone was in for a spook on All Hallows’ Eve when Walden was rushed to the emergency room following a minor heart attack. The newly placed stent in his heart couldn’t fill the void of loved ones, though. As the lonesome billionaire depressingly put things, the only people who give a damn about him are Alan, Berta and his seemingly distant mom.

After a failed marriage to Bridget, a failed marriage proposal to Zoey, and a destined-to-fail relationship with Kate, Walden isn’t keen on the idea of any further romantic entanglements. All he really wants is his own Jake – a son who isn’t afraid to ask the hard questions, like when the fourth of July falls in our current calendar year.

Walden’s decision to bring a child into his home isn’t made easy by his newly recruited adoption lawyer (Aisha Tyler, “The Talk”). As it turns out, large pockets and devilishly good looks won’t help our protagonist on his quest to fatherhood, as adoptions are almost always granted exclusively to married couples. Frustrated by the outcome, and realizing that Alan’s the closest thing he’ll ever have to a committed relationship (it’s not like he’s ever leaving that Malibu beach house), Walden gets down on one knee, and asks for his super friend’s hand in marriage. Together, they can adopt and raise a young boy, thus bringing “Two and a Half Men” full circle.

Walden’s desire to be a dad is perfectly understandable. What isn’t understandable is why a man with his wealth wouldn’t just avoid the adoption progress altogether and hire a private surrogate. Hopefully, that can be addressed in a not-so-distant future episode. After the honeymoon, of course.

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