Still undecided as to whether or not DEXTER is in the midst of its weakest season to date? Perhaps these three simple signs will help confirm your suspicions: 1) It took us until Tuesday morning to watch Sunday’s episode, which in previous years was practically unheard of. 2) Debra Morgan, once the show’s most grating character has quietly evolved into the series’ most interesting one as she begins her journey that we can only hope ends with her discovering the truth about her brother’s extra curricular activities . And 3) Most alarming of all was the fact that we — among with many others — completely called Sunday’s twist — you know, the traditional end-of-season-jaw-dropper that the show had spent eight episodes building towards — over a month ago. And speaking of twists we saw coming a mile away…

Last night’s episode of TERRA NOVA confirmed our suspicions that Skye (Allison Miller) was Commander Taylor’s much sought after Sixer mole. Yet rather than waste your valuable time patting ourselves on the back (Again!) we wanted to take a moment discuss the revelation surrounding Skye’s betrayal that had her only agreeing to do Mira’s dirty-work in exchange for Sixer medicine to cure her presumed-dead mother. For Skye’s betrayal speaks to the very question of what kind of show audiences want TERRA NOVA to be: Do you want a somewhat saccharin science fiction series akin to STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION where everyone at their core is good with the exception of a few bad apples whose actions are usually as a result of evil outside forces pulling some sort of string? Or would you prefer the show to go the more gritty and dark STAR TREK: DEEP SPACE NINE route, where not everything is black and white but rather shades of morally ambiguous grey? We for one, having already had our fill of dark and depressing hour long dramas in the vein of BATTLESTAR GALACTICA, THE WALKING DEAD among many others, is more than content to enjoy TERRA NOVA’s family-friendly approach. What say you?

And finally, despite the fact that we find it hard to believe last night’s fantastic Thanksgiving, err.. sorry, Planksgiving-themed episode of HART OF DIXIE couldn’t have aired prior to the actual holiday, we wanted to give a much-needed shout out to the best thing to happen to the CW network since THE VAMPIRE DIARIES. What’s more, the delightful denizens of Bluebell Alabama and their seemingly never-ending parade of festivals is proof positive that a hit CW show need not always center around a group of vapid twenty-somethings playing teenagers doing really bad things. Don’t believe us? Take a look at last night’s ratings!

Just when FX thought that AMERICAN HORROR STORY had helped them corner the market on truly terrifying television came last night’s HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER guest appearance by Katie Holmes. Yet rather than ad insult to injury by joining what pretty much amounts to the entirety of the internet — which for those keeping track all but reached a consensus at precisely 8:28PM eastern standard time that last night’s performance by Holmes made Britney Spears look talented — we thought we’d focus on the positive that was Neil Patrick Harris and Cobie Smulders. Which is to say, Robin and Barney’s “B” story that had everybody’s favorite Canadian export chiding the Legen.. wait for it… dary one upon discovering that he was one-fourth Canadian was everything the much-anticipated return of Holmes’ Slutty Pumpkin wan’t: Funny, romantic and worth our time.

Since we here at theTVaddict.com pride ourselves on providing Networks and Studios with unsolicited advice on how they might wish to consider promoting their current crop of new and returning shows, we thought we’d take a moment to fill Showtime in on a little something we discovered whilst jumping on the HOMELAND bandwagon. Simply put, thanks to a winning mix of political intrigue, secretive CIA operatives and terrorists threats at every turn, it finally occurred to us what exactly has us so hooked on the Howard Gordon produced series: It’s 24 2.0! Cooler still, since the pay-cabler only requires thirteen episodes in comparison to the twenty-four that the Kiefer Sutherland starrer required as a result of the show’s central conceit, HOMELAND is able to perfectly dole out all the spine-tingling chills and didn’t-see-that-coming thrills without having to rely on filler that may-or-may-not involve a character getting stuck in a cougar trap!

This just in: The CLEVELAND SHOW has really grown on us. To the point that Sunday’s antics that saw the genuinely loveable Cleveland and Rollo Brown spend the night in a haunted house while Donna and Cleveland Jr watched was far and away the funniest thing to come out of Fox’s Animation Domination lineup. Of course, not helping things was the immense disappointment that was the series premiere of ALLEN GREGORY (Stewie Griffin he ain’t), a truly bizarre FAMILY GUY that for some reason or other decided to dedicated an episode on the unfortunate fact that Quagmire’s sister Brenda was trapped in an abusive relationship, and to paraphrase a line from ‘Comic Book Guy,’ what may have been THE SIMPSONS’ worst “Treehouse of Horrors” ever.

While it will probably won’t come as much of a surprise that our love affair with THE GOOD WIFE continues following yet another stellar episode on Sunday in which the ridiculously watchable Eli Gold (Alan Cumming) discovered that his ex-wife (Perfectly played by Parker Posey) had slept with an actual relative of Bin Laden (Seriously folks, you have to see this!), we’d be remiss if we didn’t mention our one teensy little problem with the episode. Aside from setting viewers up for what will surely be a very interesting relationship between Alicia and firm newbie Caitlin (Anna Camp), the case of the week that had Alicia investigating an unfortunate death on a ‘Booze Cruise’ did little except reinforce the unmistakable fact that we’re getting old! No really, are we the only TV Addict who had never heard of a “Stoplight Party?”

As someone who has always had a special affinity for DEXTER since the very beginning (Note: Not as creepy as it sounds, we promise!) we’re disappointed to admit that when it comes to summing up our feelings for the show’s much-anticipated current season, the best we can come up with is ‘conflicted.’ On the one hand, four weeks in, the show’s writing team deserves credit for managing to keep this aging series interesting by promoting Deb to Lieutenant, correcting last season’s wrong that was Laguerta and Angel’s marriage, and introducing a truly terrifying team of baddies (Edward James Olmos’ Professor Gellar and Colin Hanks’ Travis Marshall) into the mix. On the other — something that we can’t quite put our finger on — is missing. Whether it’s a symptom of the increasingly predictable nature of the show (Does anyone else have a feeling that Professor Gellar is to Travis what Harry is to Dexter?) or the fact that the astounding success of the series has all but eviscerated the once spine-tingling stakes for America’s favorite serial killer seeing as though Showtime isn’t about to put a knife in the back of its most popular property anytime soon, the simple fact of the matter is that this once must-watch-for-fear-of-being-spoiled-show has quietly devolved into yeah, we’ll-watch-it-when-we-get-around-to-it. #sad

Dear ABC (Re: PAN AM), a multimillion-dollar per episode price tag and top notch talent both in front and behind the camera is not enough to get us to to care about a group of women whose personalities are about as inciting as airplane food. We’re sorry.

With this being DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES eighth and final season, a part of us feels really bad for having jumped off the bandwagon at the start of this year. Until that is we decided to give last night’s episode one last kick at the can. Cut to a forty-something Susan Mayer (Teri Hatcher) not being able to compose herself during an art class involving a nude model and us very quickly realizing that we have far better things to do with our time. Which brings us to…

In response to last night’s tweet that had us exclaiming just how in love we are with THE GOOD WIFE, a follower (@tvonmyterms) asked us to be specific. So here, in a nutshell, it goes: From a seemingly never-ending roster of ridiculously talented guest stars (Anna Camp! Dylan Baker! Lisa Edelstein!) to a level of storytelling — complete with political intrigue, back room deals and sizzling romance — that has become almost unheard of on Broadcast television, THE GOOD WIFE doesn’t just manage to keep us on the edge of our seat each and every Sunday night, it keeps us off our iPad, which in this day and age, is sadly almost unheard of.

Since it has become increasingly rare when our viewing habits intersect with that of the rest of the country, we here at theTVaddict.com just wanted to take a moment and thank the 13 million or so of you who gave last night’s series premiere of ONCE UPON A TIME a try. And while we don’t pretend to know whether or not co-creators Adam Horowitz and Edward Kitsis have what it takes to maintain the level of story-telling demonstrated in the pilot, we sure as heck are looking forward to finding out.

Until the last minute twist that revealed who is about to be a mommy, last night’s season premiere of GOSSIP GIRL was… well, nothing much to talk about. Serena’s Hollywood job is a snore, thanks in large part to the boring folks cast to play the various cliches and stereotypes surrounding her. Chuck deciding to say “yes” to everything would be a great development… if we’d ever thought of his as someone to deny himself anything. Nate continued to flounder in storyline limbo, sleeping with yet another older woman. (Does this guy need therapy to deal with his mommy issues?) And, of course, Blair whined. About what this week? Well, let’s see. She whined about every detail regarding her royal wedding and, most ludicrously, she whined about not be allowed to attend some royals-only speech. That’s right, she’s upset about not being able to attend a speech. There was, of course, a party, as is required of every episode. I imagine that in the writer’s room, the first thing they discuss each week is what the party-of-the-week will be and how it will turn into a disaster. The only real surprise at this particular party was that the pool around which it took place did not have anyone shoved into it. Things finally perked up in the final moments with Chuck’s bruise, Blair’s secret and Serena’s run-in with the chick who pretended to be her cousin last year, so hopefully, next week’s outing will be more juicy.
 
I almost didn’t check out the new sitcom WHITNEY because it got some pretty awful reviews. And yet, having finally gotten around to watching, I can’t for the life of me figure out why. The cast was largely appealing and the pilot, while not the best thing ever, was a heck of a lot better than some of the new sitcoms hitting the airwaves this year. (Yes, I’m lookin’ at you HOW TO BE A GENTLEMAN.) By the end of the episode, I’d rearranged my taping schedule, having decided that WHITNEY is a keeper.
 
I’d really hoped that going into this season knowing it would be their last, the folks at DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES would pull out all the stops. Unfortunately, the season premiere was okay, but nothing out of the ordinary. And what the heck does poor Vanessa Williams have to do to get out of storyline Siberia? Once again, the ladies of Wisteria Lane were caught up in a story that brought them all together… except for poor Wilhelmina-lite, who was stuck with nothing to do but vamp it up for the new guy on the street who was, of course, introduced in the tried-and-true fashion of walking up behind people who are talking about him. Sigh.  And can anyone explain why rich folks like him keep moving into the same middle-class neighborhood as barely-getting-by Mike and Susan or often-struggling Tom and Lynette? This has bothered me since back in the day when we were supposed to believe that Carlos and Gaby were way-uppermiddle class yet opted to shove all their uber-expensive tchotchkes into a house next to single-mom Susan.
 
Monday marked the official beginning of DAYS OF OUR LIVES’ much-ballyhooed reboot. Longtime fans had to have been thrilled to see formerly-exiled faves John and Marlena return, and the whole episode was like a tribute to better times. In a downright brilliant move, the show unleashed a weeks-long advertising blitz to let people know that things were getting back on track and, even smarter, kicked things off on the first day that it would no longer have ALL MY CHILDREN (sob!) as a time-slot competitor. It’s a little too early to declare that happy DAYS are back again, but we having been this excited about a retooling since GENERAL HOSPITAL booted Bob Guza and brought in Garin Wolf. As they say, stay tuned, because we’ll be keeping our eye on the show and letting you know how it’s looking!

I’ll be damned! After months of teasing the world with an advertising campaign that promised that all will be revealed, last night’s Ashton Kutcher-infused TWO AND A HALF MEN did just that. Unfortunately, complete with incredibly juvenile fart jokes and raunch sexual “humour” that would have totally killed in a seventh grade classroom, the revelation went a little something like so: 16 28 million viewers can be wrong, especially when they continue to tune in and make TWO AND A HALF MEN television’s most watched comedy.

And speaking of revelations, still reeling from last night’s big one that had Beckett admitting to her new therapist (STAR TREK: DEEP SPACE NINE’s Michael Dorn) that she was conscious for Castle’s “I love you” following the aftermath of last May’s shocking shooting? We sure as heck are! Which is why we wanted to take this opportunity to give kudos to executive producer Andrew Marlowe and his team of talented writers for believably keeping this will-they-or-won’t-they-interesting. No really. Unlike other shows that tend to concoct relationship roadblocks by tossing in yet another tired third party to get in between our star crossed lovers, CASTLE continues to delay the inevitable in the right way by ensuring that Beckett will never be in the place she needs to be for a happy and healthy relationship with Castle until she solves the haunting mystery of her mother’s murder. And you know what, assuming that investigation doesn’t last for say, the next six seasons, we’re kind of okay with that.

No Mother. No Bride. No Problem!. Or at least that was our reaction to last night’s back-to-back episodes of HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER which delivered the one thing we’ve been rooting for since way back in season one. The adorable Ashley Williams’ Victoria — also known as Ted’s only relationship outside of Robin that we truly ever found ourselves investing in — is back. And while it remains to be seen what exactly brought Victoria back into the fold, and more importantly, what role she plays in the continuing and often-times frustrating tale of how Ted Mosby met the titular you know who, executive producers Carter Bays and Craig Thomas will be pleased to discover that they just bought themselves quite a bit of good will with last night’s shocker.

As if forcing us to tune into last night’s TWO AND A HALF MEN wasn’t bad enough, Charlie Sheen’s massively overhyped and surprisingly unfunny Comedy Central Roast had us saying one thing we never in a million years thought we would: We miss Donald Trump.

Ladies and gents, allow us to make a not-so-bold prediction: NBC’s new sitcom FREE AGENTS will be the first new show to bite the dust. “What the hell is FREE AGENTS?” you are no doubt asking. Well, let us tell you: It is a sitcom that debuted Wednesday night with absolutely no fanfare and apparently flew so under the radar at the network that nobody noticed a boom mike made it into a shot in the opening scene. The best thing about the show? Anthony Stewart Head (much loved as BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER’s Giles) was the only true stand-out in the show, bringing a bit of spark to the stereotypical out-of-touch-with-reality boss. 

Why will tonight’s episode of THE SOUP be must-see? Because it could well be host Joel McHale’s last chance to mock BACHELOR PAD’s Vienna and Casey now that the show is over. By the way, if you’re not watching THE SOUP, you should be. McHale — who might well be both the hardest working and funniest guy currently on television — and his team keep the laughs coming at a breakneck pace. Plus, at least twice per week you’ll find yourself saying, “Really? There’s a television show called (insert name here)” only to then be presented with a clip of HILLBILLY HANDFISHIN’ that will leave you unsure whether to set the DVR or light a candle and pray for our immortal souls. 

After having gotten a tad bogged down by the tale in which virginal Hope competes with tramp-in-training Steffy for the heart (and naughty bits) of lucky Liam, THE BOLD & THE BEAUTIFUL seems to be getting itself back on track thanks to the battle brewing at Forrester Creations. After years of having slaved in the basement, it looks as if Thorne is teaming up with equally-downtrodden Taylor to stage a corporate coup! For years, fans have complained about the lack of airtime devoted to Thorne, who’s always been treated like a second-class citizen by everyone from the writers to his mother, Stephanie. It looks as if an epic storm is brewing now that Thorne and Taylor have joined forces (and locked lips… despite the fact she kinda ran down and killed his former wife, Darla… bygones!). 

The latest edition of SURVIVOR got off to a decent start. While some criticized the show for bringing Ozzy and Coach back for their third go-rounds, it turns out that having two familiar faces in a crowd of newbies does sort of help avoid that feeling of “Who are all these people?” And let’s face it: Watching Clueless Coach struggle with that opening-challenge puzzle — which created tension in his tribe right from the get-go — was entertaining. But the big question to emerge from the premiere: How the heck long does Brandon  think he can avoid taking off his shirt and exposing the tattoos that will out him as Russell’s nephew? 

While THE YOUNG & THE RESTLESS hasn’t been doing much right these days, fans were thrilled to learn that Melody Thomas Scott has inked a new deal and will be bringing longtime heroine Nikki back to Genoa City. The stripper-turned-socialite has been much missed since a contract dispute sent the character off the rehab and her portrayer off the canvas.

Continuing to put a stake into the heart of the dreaded sophomore slump came another killer episode of THE VAMPIRE DIARIES. And since we’re very quickly running out of superlatives for what gets our vote as television’s most consistently awesome series, we’ll stray away from the usual suspects for a moment (see: Nina Dobrev’s acting and the show’s mind-boggling ability to end each-and-every-episode with a cliffhanger we totally didn’t see coming!) by celebrating something a little less obvious: The anonymous guest star! Suffice to say, one of the hallmarks of great television writing is its ability to take what very easily could have been a forgettable role — like Trevor Paterson’s spunky neophyte vampire Slater — and in the span of less than 44 minutes make the audience care. To the point where we have a feeling we weren’t the only TV Addicts who were genuinely hoping that creators Kevin Williamson and Julie Plec would have an inexplicable change of heart as Elijah slowly compelled Slater to drive a stake into his own heart. Ouch.

On the off chance FRINGE’s episode which saw a blue pen set off a chain reaction that usually ended up with someone dead didn’t make it clear enough, it’s official: The pen is mightier than the sword, particularly if it’s a colored one. Or at least that’s the conclusion we’ve come to following last night’s instalment of COMMUNITY (Best bottle show ever!) in which a missing blue pen of Annie’s and the ensuing investigation that followed culminated in what was hands down the funniest episode of the season to date. So much so that we’d like to implore creator Dan Harmon to pick up a pen of his own, and take this down: While the occasional pop culture homage and/or Betty White guest appearance may provide the Network with ample fodder in which to promote the series — COMMMUNITY is at its best when it focuses on what’s right in front or you — seven of the funniest actors on television and one really creepy monkey with an apparent hoarding problem.

And finally, despite our usual dislike of episodes that take place outside of the confines of Dunder Mifflin, last night’s instlament of THE OFFICE, which had the gang spending their after-hours at a GLEE viewing party hosted by Erin and Gabe may have been our favorite of the season. Not so much as a result of the show itself, but rather for the fact that we finally found a kindred spirit in Kelly Kapoor. Whose inability to deal with Phyllis’ inane questions (“Which one’s Glee?”) and displeasure over the direction the viewing party took (“Is this a Glee watching party or a a Glee pausing party”) brought up memories of high school and why we’re not so much into viewing parties anymore.

It’s not often I admit to being wrong. This is not to say I’m never wrong, but rather that I rarely admit to it. However, where NBC’s freshman series OUTSOURCED is concerned, I feel the need to not only admit that my initial opinion was wrong, but heap a bit of praise upon the show. Sight unseen, I — and I suspect many others — rolled my eyes at what I assumed would be an offensive show playing upon every stereotype in the book. But in my rush to judgement, I forgot that some of the best television shows manage to play upon stereotypes (which are, in almost all cases, based on at least a nugget of truth) in a funny and often heartwarming way. ALL IN THE FAMILY managed to make us love a bigot, while WILL & GRACE taught us the difference between laughing with and laughing at people who embrace the very thing that makes them different. Likewise, OUTSOURCED proves itself to be a quirky, wildly-charming show populated by some of the most lovable folks currently occupying primetime. Whether the humor is mined from names — my personal favorite is Manmeet — or the culture clashes born of the stranger-in-a-strange-land premise, the laughs here are as hardy as they are heartfelt. While comparisons to THE OFFICE are perhaps inevitable, OUTSOURCED is quickly shaping up to be a far superior show if only for the lack of a character as annoying as Michael or Dwight (although Diedrich Bader’s borderline-psychotic Charlie comes pretty darn close). 

I hate commercials. With a passion. So for me to actually stop fast-forwarding whatever I happen to be watching, a commercial has to really, really grab my attention. Yet that’s exactly what I do whenever the Allstate commercials featuring Dean Winters — aka OZ inmate Ryan O’Reailly and 30 ROCK’s “beeper king” Dennis Duffy — playing Mayhem (Posted Above). In fact, I think I might have to form some kind of support group for people who can’t get enough of insurance spokespeople. Whether it’s Winters, the Geiko gecko or Flo, the Progressive insurance gal (aka actress Stephanie Courtney), the industry currently seems to have cornered the market on cool spokesfolk.

After several cycles of CELEBRITY APPRENTICE, it’s actually nice to have a real-people edition of the show. On the star-packed edition, nearly every challenge inevitably boils down to “who can get the most rich people to write big checks”, whereas the regular version actually relies, at least to some extent, on actual abilities. And let’s face it: Rare is the celeb who’s going to bring the train-wreck appeal of David, to whom every viewer can relate. He’s that guy in the next cubicle we all do everything in our power to avoid because, well, he’s an ass. And of course, every single quality that would make him a nightmarish co-worker happens to make for fantastic television. 

As regular readers of this column know, DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES is one of those shows that I want better for. It has an incredible cast and a premise that should make it one of the most entertaining shows on the dial. Yet all too often, it falls short thanks to what I consider a fatal flaw: The inability — or perhaps unwillingness — of its writing staff to allow the sudsy drama to truly lather up. This season has, so far, been a bit of a mixed bag, although better than last. As usual the villain-of-the-year is as intriguing as he is underplayed. We get tiny snippets of Paul and his in-over-her-head bride, but have yet to see enough of his plot to be intrigued. And new-gal-on-the-block Renee (the always-phenomenal Vanessa Williams) is… well, a toothless Wilhelmina. Is she a maneater or a gal pal? Both, because she’s currently being written as a character who bends to the needs of that week’s script as opposed to one who has an actual purpose on the show. What should have been a wonderfully emotional story involving Gaby and Carlos dealing with a long-ago baby switch has all-too-quickly turned into a predictable mess. Surprisingly, Susan’s foray into soft-core porn has been one of the most compelling tales of the season. It’s nice to see a storyline which in the past would have been dealt with in a single episode for laughs actually turned into something with at least a few more teeth. In fact, it seems that this season. Lynette and Tom have been turned into the “plot-of-the-week” couple, with him developing “post-partum depression” and, a week later, Lynette turning pre-teen Penny into a junior nanny. It’s still a hit-or-miss show for me, but this season has, so far, been at least slightly more hit than miss.

Let this be a lesson to all you current and future television showrunners out there. Last night’s instalment of THE EVENT should be looked upon as the perfect example of how not to cleverly construct an episodic cliffhanger. Which is to say, if the “jaw-dropping” final scene that you’ve been spending three episodes building up to involves re-animating a group of passengers that were already pronounced dead on the scene, and among said roster of passengers is none other than highly paid series regular Scott Patterson. Well, we think the technical term is, “Holy Anti-Climactic Batman!”

Just how good was last night’s GOSSIP GIRL that culminated in Chuck Bass declaring his very own version of The Hunger Games on the queen of scheme Blair Waldorf? So deliciously fun that we’ll forgive the seemingly never-ending snooze-worthy Dan/Serena/Nate love triangle that outside of poor lovesick Vanessa, absolutely nobody cares about.

And speaking of completely superfluous characters, last night’s 90210 was thisclose to becoming an instant-classic! Unfortunately, the only thing holding it back following Teddy’s incredibly timely struggle with his sexuality (Related: Chris Colfer promises “It Gets Better”), Naomi’s continued attempt to come to grips with her attacker and a long-awaited-honest-to-goodness interesting dilemma for Dixon was two words: Naveed Shirazi. A character that was so poorly conceived it almost has us pining for the return of Dustin Milligan’s Ethan, or wishing the writers would — in a nod to the original series which just yesterday celebrated its 20th Anniversary — pull a “Scotty,” in the living room, with a pistol!

How does a man who has never been able to emotionally connect with anyone or anything deal with the brutal death of the one person who came closest to bringing out his humanity? And how is his seeming lack of humanity viewed by those around him, including the sister who has long struggled to understand his quirks? That was the intriguing premise behind the fifth-season premiere of DEXTER as our anti-hero struggled with the aftermath of wife Rita’s murder. Having Dexter’s disconnect from humanity be the very thing that makes him look like a prime suspect in Rita’s death was a stroke of genius, and the scene in which he broke news of her death to his stepchildren while wearing a pair of mouse ears from Disney World – aka the Happiest Place On Earth – beautifully displayed exactly the kind of dichotomy this series has specialized in from the beginning. If there was one flaw with the episode, it lay not in what transpired during the hour but in the spoiler-heavy preview of what’s to come this season. That said, having not flicked the TV off quickly enough to avoid seeing them, it looks as if we’re in for a hell of a ride over the next 13-weeks.
 

If last night’s FAMILY GUY is a sign of what to expect this weekend, we’re in for some good stuff. While the episode wasn’t as laugh-packed as usual, it was an epic homage to every flick from And Then There Were None to Clue, all done with a directorial flair that showcased the limitless nature of animation. It’ll be interesting to see if the episode’s deaths — especially those of Mort’s wife and newswoman Diane Simmons — are mined for future plotlines. Perhaps Marge as Tom Tucker’s new on-air sparring partner, or Mort’s search for a new wife? Of course, this being FAMILY GUY, the whole thing could wind up being explained in passing as someone’s dream. One thing’s for sure: I can’t wait until next week, when Brian takes on Rush Limbaugh! Talk about a dog-eat-dog scenario! 

To say I haven’t been a huge fan of DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES over the past few seasons would be an understatement on par with John McCain is no spring chicken. But I’ll admit that last night’s episode — the seventh-season premiere — was better than pretty much any of last season’s episodes. In fact, the highly-publicized arrival of Vanessa Williams’ Renee was actually the low point of the hour. Don’t get me wrong: I’m a huge fan of Williams in general and her UGLY BETTY persona, Wilhelmina, in particular. But come on… who didn’t know the second Lynette began talking about her friend with the fabulous life that by the end of the night, it would be revealed Renee’s stock had plunged lower than the neckline on her portrayer’s dress? The plot that found Susan preparing for a life in softcore porn was equally predictable, although it could morph into a fantastic little story in which her attempt to moonlight for cash winds up involving her in a dangerous world behind her comprehension. (But let’s face it, under Mark Cherry, it’s pretty much a rule that all Susan-related plots be played for laughs, meaning in two or three weeks, this story will be dropped like that bombshell Carlos will soon be unleashing on poor Gaby. No, for me, the promise comes from the returns of Paul Young and, more importantly, Felicia Tillman (played by the incredible Harriet Samson Harris, whom many will remember from her awesome portrayal of FRASIER’s agent, Bebe). While I’m sure that — as in every single season so far — what starts out as an exciting mystery will quickly become boring thanks to too-few plot developments spread over too many episodes, with this show, I’ve learned to take what I can get. 

I wanted to love RUNNING WILDE if for no other reason than the talents involved, but for now, I’ll have to settle for being in like with it. This is through no fault of leads Will Arnett and Keri Russel, who perfectly embody (respectively) blustering billionaire Steven and cute-if-clueless Emily. Rather, the pilot simply felt a little too forced. All the trademarks one would expect from a show executive produced by three members of the ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT team are in place… and in a way, that might be part of the problem. Some of the quirks are too familiar (the voiceover by Stefania Owen’s precocious pre-teen, Puddle). Others are too over the top. (Until now, I’d have thought one could never get enough of miniature horses. Turns out, I was wrong.) Then again, I wasn’t blown away by the ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT pilot, and that show went on to become one of my all-time faves.