Last week the five major broadcast networks outlined their new fall schedules and previewed clips of new series for advertisers at their annual Upfront presentations. After taking a look at these clips myself, I’ve compiled a list, divided into what’s most promising, what’s roughly in the middle, and what looks horrible. These aren’t reviews per se, they’re just immediate reactions to very brief footage – I’ll reevaluate after I’ve screened the pilots later this summer.  First up, least promising of the bunch… Alex O’Loughlin fans, please don’t hurt us.?

100 QUESTIONS (NBC)
Buzz was that NBC was high on this comedy before its Upfront presentation and that it was being touted as “the next FRIENDS.” Highly doubtful, and I’m pretty sure the laugh track was the only thing laughing during the dreadfully unfunny trailer.

BROTHERS (FOX)
Starring former New York Giant Michael Strahan…plays former NFL player Mike Trainor, who returns home to help his brother’s struggling restaurant business. CCH Pounder from The Shield and Carl Weathers also star as their parents. Strahan does fine, but what would really be great is if the whole thing didn’t feel so strained and dated.

THE DEEP END (ABC)
GREY’S ANATOMY with lawyers. Because it refuses to stop.

THE FORGOTTEN (ABC)
A band of amateur detectives work to identify victims and solve their murders. Looks like a COLD CASE lookalike CBS passed on – and with good reason.

HANK (ABC)
Kelsey Grammer plays a CEO who loses everything in the stock market, forcing him and his family to relocate to suburban Virginia. It’s the recession comedy of the year: humble, and kind of cheap.

HAPPY TOWN (ABC)
I demand a moratorium on prefacing previews with “from the network that brought you [insert cult favorite here].” Just because you mention TWIN PEAKS, doesn’t make this murder mystery set in a town Where Bad Things Don’t Happen Twin Peaks. Got it?

MELROSE PLACE (The CW)
Sydney Andrews, of the original Melrose, inexplicably survived her seemingly fatal death and has returned to collect rent from a whole new gaggle of tenants, which include Ashlee Simpson-Wentz in her return to TV. Like the 90210 remake, it seems to lack the balance of soap and melodrama. Needs a Heather Locklear sooner than later.

PAST LIFE (FOX)
Honestly, it’s the silliest sounding show I’ve heard in a while. About “an unlikely pair of past-life detectives who investigate whether what is happening to you today is the result of who you were before,” I couldn’t decipher from the clips previewed whether this reincarnation drama was a joke or a sadly mistaken idea for a procedural.

THREE RIVERS (CBS)
MOONLIGHT’s Alex O’Louglin is a star dammit! It’s great CBS is so enamored with him, but could they find a role any more thankless than as a surgeon at a organ transplant hospital? I don’t even like him that much I know he deserves better than this.

TRAUMA (NBC)
It’s THIRD WATCH, with a bigger budget (so more explosions) and about paramedics. Already I’m feeling medical drama fatigue.

THE VAMPIRE DIARIES (The CW)
Twilight = icky. Twilight x Dawson’s Creek’s Kevin Williamson = slightly less icky, but still pretty icky.

THREE RIVERS
According to the official CBS description: THREE RIVERS is a medical drama that goes inside the emotionally complex lives of organ donors, the recipients and the surgeons at the preeminent transplant hospital in the country where every moment counts.

According to this TV Addict: With apologies to his legions of dedicated, passionate and very vocal fanbase, Alex O’Loughlin deserves far better than a re-tread of a failed TNT medical drama (see: HEARTLAND starring EVERWOOD alum Treat Williams)

ACCIDENTALLY ON PURPOSE
According to the official CBS description: ACCIDENTALLY ON PURPOSE is a comedy starring Golden Globe Award winner Jenna Elfman as Billie, a single woman who finds herself ‘accidentally’ pregnant after a one-night stand with a much younger guy, and decides to keep the baby and the guy.

According to this TV Addict: It’s KNOCKED UP the series! Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Especially when you surround the immensely likable Jenna Elfman with THE DAILY SHOW’s Larry Wilmore and UGLY BETTY’s criminally underused Ashley Jensen (Who we’re fairly confident saw more screen time in the above two minute preview than she did for most of BETTY’s third season.)

THE GOOD WIFE
According to the official CBS description: THE GOOD WIFE is a drama starring Emmy Award winner Julianna Margulies as a wife and mother who must assume full responsibility for her family and re-enter the workforce after her husband’s very public sex and political corruption scandal lands him in jail.

According to this TV Addict: Turning this run-of-the-mill legal procedural from good to great is the supporting cast which includes GILMORE GIRLS’ Matt Czuchry and SPORTS NIGHT’s Josh Charles.

NCIS: LOS ANGELES
According to the official CBS description: NCIS: LOS ANGELES is a drama about the high stakes world of undercover surveillance at the Office of Special Projects (OSP), a division of NCIS that is charged with apprehending dangerous and elusive criminals that pose a threat to the nation’s security.

According to this TV Addict: ZZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzz.