THE GOOD WIFE! GOTHAM! SCANDAL! THE MINDY PROJECT! The TV Addict Week in Rewind

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Best Guest Star: THE MINDY PROJECT scored a homerun by casting Rhea Pearlman as Danny’s TV Guide loving, girlfriend hating hypercritical mom, Annette. Here’s hoping she swings by from time to time!

Best First Impression: Despite being on screen for less than a minute, Cory Michael Smith managed to perfectly capture Edward Nigma — aka The Riddler — in the pilot of GOTHAM.

Most Relatable Moment: SLEEPY HOLLOW’s Ichabod may be, like, 250 years old, but everyone who’s ever been the victim of an unwanted surprise party nodded when he declared, “Is there no end to this birthday madness?”

Least Consequential Death: While the two-hour finale of DALLAS’ third season featured great moments and numerous cliffhangers, the highly-touted “Which Ewing will die?” teaser wound up being kinda pointless. Does anybody really care that Christopher — who was barely even in the episode — bit the dust?

Best Passing Glance: SCANDAL delivered on just about everything fans could want… especially in that closing shot of Olivia and Fitz walking past one another, eyes straight ahead, fingers practically twitching with the desire to touch… never has a scene with so little physical contact caused so much swooning. [Read more...]

THE BOLD & THE BEAUTIFUL! STALKER! DANCING WITH THE STARS! GENERAL HOSPITAL! The TV Addict Week in Rewind

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Best Casting: Aubrey Plaza, perhaps best known as the slow-speaking, sarcastic secretary-from-hell April on PARKS & RECREATION, will give voice to the slow-speaking, sarcastic pet-from-hell in Lifetime’s GRUMPY CAT’S WORST CHRISTMAS EVER. Finally, a holiday special for us Grinches!

Generic Rebranding Of The Week: The TV Guide Network will now be known as “Pop,” promising to celebrate fandom with a “fun, enthusiastic and celebratory approach [that won’t be’ mean-spirited or snarky.” Guess that means the Twitterverse won’t be taking part!

Most Likely To Bring About Change: Forget public outcry. Want to know what’s going to cause the NFL to take series action against their violence-exhibiting players? The fact that Anheuser-Busch is “not yet satisfied with the league’s handling” of the situation. Forget bros-before-hos, kids, cause when it comes to sponsors, it’s all about payers-before-players.

Best Calling-Out: Finally, someone called THE BOLD & THE BEAUTIFUL’s Hope out on the fact that she married Wyatt because Liam was, like, 45 seconds late. “You never thought it could be a flight delay or bad traffic or tuberculosis or the flu?” asked Quinn. “You needed an excuse to marry the brother of your fiancée!” [Read more...]

MISTRESSES! MASTERS OF SEX! DALLAS! JOAN RIVERS! The TV Addict Week in Rewind

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Least Expected Connection: Just when we were convinced that MASTERS OF SEX was going to reveal that Bill and his mysterious new patient had once been lovers, we found out they were actually secret siblings!

Most Undramatic Drama: After deciding to exit BACHELOR IN PARADISE rather than have America see him not get a rose, bad boy Jesse was called out by Lacy, Michelle and Christy in what had to have been the least confrontational confrontation in recent memory.

Tackiest Move: Despite her being one of their own stars, E! claimed “sources” were telling them that Joan Rivers was on the road to recovery… only to have her daughter inform folks that her mom is, in fact, on life support. Second runner-up: The New York Times, which initially listed Rivers’ date of death as “1914.”

Most Classic Cliffhanger: A runaway bride. An illicit pairing about to be discovered. A mysterious medical malady. MISTRESSES’ second season finale had all the bases covered. Of course, the biggest cliffhanger of all is whether or not the show will be renewed so that these endings can be resolved! [Read more...]

DOWNTON ABBEY! AMERICAN HORROR STORY! DATING NAKED! CASTLE! The TV Addict Week in Rewind!

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Best Response: After being taken to task for a publicity shot featuring a very un-period plastic water bottle, the cast of DOWNTON ABBEY took another pic mocking the mistake.

Most Unexpected Connection: MASTERS OF SEX’s Libby was shocked — and so were we — to discover that Coral’s supposed lover was actually her brother!

Least Likely To Get Fired: Before drenching Julie Chen as part of the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge, Will Arnett declared, “I’ve got to say, I don’t think this is a good idea, to do this to the bosses wife, but I’m gonna do it.” Of course, her husband — CBS head honcho Les Moonves was the one who challenged the Chenbot. And, just to make sure it wasn’t at all tacky or seen as using something awesome for less than awesome purposes, he challenged her to do it live on BIG BROTHER.

Longest Search: After doing everything but hold cattle calls, THE YOUNG & THE RESTLESS finally filled the role of Adam, vacated after portrayer Michael Muhney was fired in a firestorm of scandalous accusations. The new Adam will be (drumroll, please) Justin Hartley, most recently of REVENGE and MISTRESSES.

Least Likely To Understand His Place: Ian Ziering wants a raise for the third flick in the ZIERINGNADO series. Oh, wait. That’s not what it’s called?

Best Early Halloween Treat: FX announced that AMERICAN HORROR STORY: FREAK SHOW will debut on October 8. [Read more...]

OUTLANDER! DOWNTON ABBEY! THE WALKING DEAD! GENERAL HOSPITAL! MISTRESSES! BIG BROTHER! The TV Addict Week in Rewind

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Funniest “Blooper”: An official DOWNTON ABBEY photo features Lady Edith, her loving father… and a very modern plastic water bottle!

Best Comeback: After being left hanging by Caleb, BIG BROTHER’s Frankie still managed to win a two-man competition all by himself.

Shortest Strike: A walk-out by SURVIVOR’s editors ended a day later when their issues were addressed by the production company.

Biggest Irony: With its programming increasingly being hate-watched and debunked, it would appear that Shark Week has, in fact, jumped the shark.

Quickest Wedding: Moments after being stood up by would-be beau Liam, THE BOLD & THE BEAUTIFUL’s Hope took the plunge (literally) by jumping into a marriage with his brother, Wyatt, and leaping off a yacht! [Read more...]

THE BIG BANG THEORY! MISTRESSES! Y&R! BIG BROTHER! The TV Addict Week in Rewind

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Richest Nerds: THE BIG BANG THEORY cast finally wrapped a deal that will give them all pay checks pretty much anyone short of Bill Gates would envy. Because why shouldn’t people pretending to be smart make more money than, you know, teachers and scientists and others who actually are.

Best Reaction: Awakened in the night by her cop mom being summoned to a crime scene, MURDER IN THE FIRST’s Louise reacted as only a tired six-year-old can by insisting, “These murders have got to stop!”

Most Susceptible: MISTRESSES’ Josslyn never thought of Harry as more than her brother-in-law… until it was put in her head how sexy he is. Turns out, there are none so blind as those who will not see!

Least Surprising Cancellation: The biggest shock where BLACK BOX getting the axe is concerned is that ABC waited this long.

Best Drinking Buddy: CBS announced that FAMILY TIES alum Meredith Baxter will join THE YOUNG & THE RESTLESS as Maureen, who’ll belly up to the bar with newly off-the-wagon alcoholic Nikki. [Read more...]

THE LEFTOVERS! 24! ONCE UPON A TIME! GENERAL HOSPITAL! The TV Addict Week in Rewind

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Proof “They” Don’t Always Know: Despite media experts telling anyone who’d listen that SHARKNADO 2 would prove a ratings disappointment, the cheesy sequel brought in 3.9 million viewers to set a record for SyFy Channel flicks.

Hardest To Watch: While the Guilty Remnant have creeped us out from the very beginning of THE LEFTOVERS, the stoning death of Gladys was downright brutal… even for this relentlessly depressing series.

Least Shocking Shocker: Come on… given everything you’ve ever read about Kiefer Sutherland, are you really surprised by allegations that he’s a pain in the butt to work with?

Best Return: Ah, it’s so good having bad girl Kristen DiMera (and portrayer Eileen Davidson) back on DAYS OF OUR LIVES!

Cheekiest Theft: If you were hoping to see more of sexy Detective Hosko on REVENGE next season, you’re outta luck. Portrayer Tyler Jacob Moore — best known as SHAMELESS’ Tony — was grabbed up by ONCE UPON A TIME, where he’ll play Frozen’s Prince Hans. [Read more...]

BIG BROTHER! MISTRESSES! UNDER THE DOME! ALL MY CHILDREN! HANNIBAL! The TV Addict Week in Rewind

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Best Ad Placement: Even as BIG BROTHER’s Caleb continued to creepily obsess over fellow housemate Amber, the bottom half of the screen featured a large ad for the upcoming CBS show STALKER.

Most Likely To Be In Denial: Sure, MISTRESSES’ Joss insists that she and Harry have never — and would never — been anything more than friends. But come on… haven’t we all suspected she’d hook up with her former brother-in-law pretty much since day one?

Biggest Waste Of Time: Even the bloopers, usually a highlight of THE BACHELORETTE: THE MEN TELL ALL, were lame this season, with pimpage of THE BACHELOR IN PARADISE running longer than behind-the-scenes-blunders package.

Coolest Return: THE YOUNG & THE RESTLESS alum Shemar Moore will return to the soap — where he played swoonworthy shutterbug Malcolm Winters — for two days in September. While fans are hoping Malcolm might be bringing divalicious Drucilla (as played by Victoria Rowell) along for the ride, I’ll settle for him slapping some sense into his unlucky-in-love big brother, Neil!

Best Revenge: Proving that turnabout is fair play, THE BOLD & THE BEAUTIFUL’s Ridge — recently dumped from a helicopter (ya had to be there) — got rival Bill to confess he was responsible by… well, how else? Taking the tycoon for a terrifying helicopter flight of his own!

Details To Come: CBS signed a deal with mega-popular author James Patterson. One can only assume, based on the trajectory of his writing career, said contract involves writing a few really great episodes of a TV series, then slumming for a buck by allowing the network to pump out a bunch of crap with his name on it but “co-written” by crappier scribes.

Least Teachable Moment: This week’s THE LEFTOVERS had us Googling the term “Roman helmet” after one was given to the saddest town on the planet’s fake baby Jesus. Huh. Coulda gone my whole life not knowing what that term meant! [Read more...]

24! MISTRESSES! BIG BROTHER! GENERAL HOSPITAL! TCA! NCIS! The TV Addict Week in Rewind

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Least Happy Ending: Man, talk about a crappy day. 24′s Jack lost his one-time love, Audrey, and wound up in Russian custody as the season ended. On the plus side, he did save the world (again) and get to behead a dude.

Most Likely To Be Arrested For Stalking: BIG BROTHER’s Caleb is proving to be a guy who won’t take no for an answer where Amber is concerned.

Truest Philosophy: “Men generally don’t dump young women for older women,” mused MISTRESSES’ Karen. “They dump young women for younger women. I really don’t like younger women.”

Lamest Rose Ceremony: After Andi booted farmer Chris, THE BACHELORETTE insisted on going through with a rose ceremony… despite the fact nobody would be eliminated and there was absolutely zero chance of creepy Nick or lunkhead Josh rejected the proffered flower.

Deadliest Finale: WGN’s SALEM wrapped up a killer season by knocking off several characters, challenging relationships, shifting loyalties and leaving us hanging like the proverbial accused witch until Season 2 kicks off in April!

Lamest Fake-Out: Fox endlessly promoted HELL’S KITCHEN in such a way as to make viewers — well, really dumb viewers — think perhaps President Obama would be dining in the not-so-fine establishment. Instead, the security-surrounded, limo-driven guests were… the families of the cheftestaints.

Saddest (Fictional) Death: GENERAL HOSPITAL’s Rafe bit the dust following a car accident, and I’m not sure which was more tear-enducing… the gorgeously directed scenes in which the character was taken off life-support, or the fact that the soap axed his talented portrayer, Jimmy Deshler. (As many fans were quick to point out, however, Rafeis kinda sorta the son of a possible vampire, and heaven knows most of the show’s characters have made return trips from the grave… ) [Read more...]

EXTANT! RECKLESS! GLEE! CSI! MISTRESSES! BIG BROTHER! The TV Addict Week in Rewind

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Thing We Are Apparently Required To Discuss: The Emmy nominations came out, and it was a total outrage that (blank) was snubbed while (blank), a talentless hack, was recognized. Insert pointless rage here.

Lesson Least Likely To Be Learned: Yet again, the major networks and their increasingly bland programming were all but shut out of Emmy nominations. But there’s always next year, and I’m sure there’ll be a fierce Outstanding Drama battle between CBS’ SCORPION and ABC’s GALAVANT… right.

Best Revenge: DAYS OF OUR LIVES’ Sami had her man jailed for tax evasion and then took over his international conglomerate. Next time that forever-plotting, rarely succeeding Emily Thorne chick needs to formulate a plan, she should give Sami a ring!

The “Something For Everyone” Award Goes To… : Bruno Heller, executive producer of GOTHAM, who said the Batman prequel would be “fun and dark”, adding “it’s sexy, but dangerous. It’s a world of craziness and a world of beauty.” Sounds like it’s designed for people who felt like BLACK BOX wasn’t schizophrenic enough.

Worst Spoilers: The pilot of EXTANT would have been a billion times more enjoyable had not the endless ads run by CBS in the months leading up to its premiere not ruined every single plot twist, including the final scene! [Read more...]