Dear diary, today I decided to watch a soap opera for the very first time. Why? Well, it seemed almost wrong to call my elf a true TV addict without having sampled the most addictive of all television formats, the continuing daytime drama. (Plus, these reruns are driving me bonkers!).
I picked the BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFUL because, well, frankly, it’s a half hour. Plus, I’d been told that it’s fairly easy for a newbie such as myself to jump into thanks to its small cast and easy-to-digest mix of humor and melodrama.
So what did I get on day one? Honestly, a mixed bag. Strike one for the genre was that B&B failed to live up to its namesake right off the bat by broadcasting in… brace yourself… hideous 1990’s style standard definition. Seriously, what is up with that. I know soaps as an industry are hurting economically, but so, too, are my eyes dammit!
That said, things got far easier on the eyes when some woman named Sandy opened off the episode with Jack Wagner. How did I not know MELROSE PLACE’s Dr. Peter Burns was doing a soap? And how, exactly, has the actor managed to not age over the past ten years? Oh there’s where the standard definition came in.
And the parallels to Aaron Spelling nigh-time sudser’s don’t end there. Turns out the crux of the episode involved a very MODELS INC. fashion house that is embroiled in a family power play over who gets control over Forrester Creations. From what I could gather, the fate of the company lies in the hands of three sisters, two of whom seem to be scheming against the other. Why? Something to do with a goatee-sporting dude who was insisting on seeing the company’s latest designs before letting the press get a glimpse of them. Call me crazy, but that seemed like a good idea to me. I may not know much about fashion, but who just sends things down the runway without letting the big guy check them out first? Me thinks there’s something afoot, but damned if I know what. Guess that’s why they say… tune in tomorrow! 
