CHARLIE’S ANGELS
According to the Official ABC Description: Everyone deserves a second chance — even a thief, a street racer and a cop who got in a little too deep. After all, the three women who solve cases for their elusive boss, Charlie Townsend, are no saints. They’re angels… Charlie’s Angels. Set in Miami, this fun, glamorous, action-packed take on the 1970s smash hit series introduces us to three new angels, all fearless detectives, head-turning beauties and close friends. There’s Abby (Rachael Taylor), a Park Avenue princess who became a world-class thief. Then there’s Kate (Annie Ilonzeh), a Miami cop who fell from grace, losing both her career and her fiancé. Finally there’s Gloria, a disgraced army lieutenant who has a way with explosives. When one of the angels’ missions ends in Gloria’s tragic death, Charlie persuades them to partner with Gloria’s childhood friend, Eve (Minka Kelly), a street racer with a mysterious past. They may not know each other yet, but one thing’s for sure — Abby, Kate and Eve will always have each others’ backs.
Why We’re Excited: As if Rachael Taylor, Annie Ilonzeh and Minka Kelly weren’t reason enough, this ABC reboot of the iconic 1976-81 series comes complete with cheestacular one-liners (Dialogue snippet: “You don’t look like cops.” “We’re not — we’re angels.”), luscious locales and the creators behind SMALLVILLE’s early (read: watchable) years Alfred Miller and Miles Gough.
Why We Probably Shouldn’t Let Our Excitement Get the Better of Us: The primetime television graveyard is littered with failed reboots of iconic 70’s shows that didn’t exactly turn out to be the next BATTLESTAR GALACTICA.
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ONCE UPON A TIME
According to the Official ABC Description: From the inventive minds of “Lost” executive producers Adam Horowitz and Edward Kitsis comes a bold new imagining of the world, where fairy tales and the modern-day are about to collide. And they all lived happily ever after – or so everyone was led to believe. Emma Swan knows how to take care of herself. She’s a 28-year-old bail bonds collector who’s been on her own ever since she was abandoned as a baby. But when the son she gave up years ago finds her, everything starts to change. Henry is now 10 years old and in desperate need of Emma’s help. He believes that Emma actually comes from an alternate world and is Snow White and Prince Charming’s missing daughter. According to his book of fairytales, they sent her away to protect her from the Evil Queen’s curse, which trapped the fairytale world forever, frozen in time, and brought them into our modern world. Of course Emma doesn’t believe a word, but when she brings Henry back to Storybrooke, she finds herself drawn to this unusual boy and his strange New England town. Concerned for Henry, she decides to stay for a while, but she soon suspects that Storybrooke is more than it seems. It’s a place where magic has been forgotten, but is still powerfully close… where fairytale characters are alive, even though they don’t remember who they once were. The epic battle for the future of all worlds is beginning, but for good to win, Emma will have to accept her destiny and fight like hell.
Why We’re Excited: It’s PUSHING DAISIES meets LOST featuring SWINGTOWN’s Lana Parrilla, BIG LOVE’s Ginnifer Goodwin and HOUSE’s Jennifer Morrison. In other words, where do we sign up!
Why We Probably Shouldn’t Let Our Excitement Get the Better of Us: What ABC neglected to mention in promoting ONCE UPON A TIME’s pedigree, is that aside from being from the “inventive minds behind LOST,” Adam Horowitz and Edward Kitsis have the dubious distinction of being the not-so-inventive minds behind Tron 2.0
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PAN AM
According to the Official ABC Description: Passion, jealousy and espionage… They do it all – and they do it at 30,000 feet. The style of the 1960s, the energy and excitement of the Jet Age and a drama full of sexy entanglements deliciously mesh in this thrilling and highly-original new series. In this modern world, air travel represents the height of luxury and Pan Am is the biggest name in the business. The planes are glamorous, the pilots are rock stars and the stewardesses are the most desirable women in the world. Not only are these flyboys and girls young and good looking, but to represent Pan Am they also have to be educated, cultured and refined. They’re trained to handle everything from in-air emergencies to unwanted advances – all without rumpling their pristine uniforms or mussing their hair. There’s Dean (Jonah Lotan) – a cocky, charismatic and ambitious new pilot – the first of a new breed not trained in the war. On the sly against company policy, he’s dating Bridget, a stunning beauty with a mysterious past. A rebellious bohemian, Maggie (Christina Ricci) turns into a buttoned up professional for work so she can see the world. Rounding out the crew are flirtatious Collette (Karine Vanasse), the adventurous Kate (Kelli Garner) and, finally, Laura (Margot Robbie) – Kate’s beauty queen younger sister, a runaway bride, who recently fled a life of domestic boredom to take to the skies.
Why We’re Excited: Aside from being MAD MEN at 30,000 feet, PAN AM will have the one thing missing from Matthew Weiner’s AMC masterpiece: Improved pacing, courtesy of the man who practically invented the Aaron Sorkin walk-and-talk, executive producer Thomas Schlamme.
Why We Probably Shouldn’t Let Our Excitement Get the Better of Us: Do you really want to be among the first onslaught of shows (See also: NBC’s upcoming THE PLAYBOY CLUB) to invite comparisons to Matthew Weiner’s AMC masterpiece MAD MEN? We sure as heck wouldn’t.
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REVENGE
According to the Official ABC Description: Wealth, beauty and status define the people in this town, but one woman is willing to destroy everyone for the sake of revenge. Emily Thorne (Emily Van Camp) is new to the Hamptons. She’s met some of her wealthy neighbors, has made a few new friends and seemingly blends into the town. But something is a little odd about a young girl living in a wealthy town all on her own, and the truth is that Emily isn’t exactly new to the neighborhood. In fact, this was once her old neighborhood, until something bad happened that ruined her family and their reputation. Now Emily is back, and she’s returned to right some of those wrongs in the best way she knows how – with a vengeance.
Why We’re Excited: After spending years embodying the young and somewhat helpless ingenue on the likes of EVERWOOD and BROTHERS & SISTERS, Emily Van Camp will finally get to take matters into her own hands.
Why We Probably Shouldn’t Let Our Excitement Get the Better of Us: Wednesday night at 10PM has recently become the ABC equivalent of the Bermuda Triangle. Where have all the viewers gone?
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LAST MAND STANDING
According to the Official ABC Description: Today it’s a woman’s world, and this man’s man is on a mission to get men back to their rightful place in society. Tim Allen returns to ABC in this new comedy from Jack Burditt (“30 Rock”). Men may have built civilizations, invented the locomotive and created ESPN, but they’re about to find out that it’s not a man’s world anymore. You can’t get manlier than Mike Baxter. He’s the marketing director for an iconic outdoor sporting goods store, he loves to have adventures while he’s traveling for work and, of course, he drives a pick-up truck. While Mike is king of the hill at work, he’s the odd man out in a home that is dominated by women — namely his wife, Vanessa, and their three daughters, 22- year-old Kristin, 17-year-old Mandy and 14-year-old Eve. After being a stay-at-home mom for years, Vanessa recently returned to the workplace and was quickly promoted (much to the dismay of her primarily male co-workers). As a result of Vanessa’s increased work load, Mike is pulled into more hands-on parenting than ever before.
Why We’re Excited: Despite a somewhat lacklustre sizzle real, our inner HOME IMPROVEMENT fan will always have a soft spot for any show that offers up the possibility of a Jonathan Taylor Thomas guest spot Tim Allen.
Why We Probably Shouldn’t Let Our Excitement Get the Better of Us: While Tim Allen was busy counting his syndication millions from HOME IMPROVEMENT, comedian Louis CK. kind of raised the bar when it comes to comedy about clueless men and the women they love.
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MAN UP
According to the Official ABC Description: Three modern men try to get in touch with their inner tough guys and redefine what it means to be a “real man” in this funny and relatable comedy. Will’s grandfather fought in WWII. Will’s father fought in Vietnam. Will plays Call of Duty on his PS3 and drinks non-dairy hazelnut creamer. So what happened to all the real men? They’re still here — they just smell like pomegranate body wash now. Meet Will (Mather Zickel). His evolved, sensitive nature is why his awesome wife, Theresa (Teri Polo), married him. But Will and his friends find themselves wondering — in a world of Axe ads and manscaping — what does it really mean to be a guy anymore? Will is more interested in finding the perfect gift for his son Nathan’s (Jake Johnson) 13th birthday than in doing his job selling insurance; sensitive soul Craig (Christopher Moynihan) still pines for his college ex, Lisa; and Kenny (Dan Fogler) clamps down on his anger and asks himself, “What would Tobey Maguire do?,” when his ex, Brenda (Amanda Detmer), starts seeing a guy (Henry Simmons) who is everything he’s not and much better looking. After Craig crashes Lisa’s wedding to try to win her back, they are all faced with an opportunity to Man Up and be like their forefathers.
Why We’re Excited: BETTER OFF TED creator Victor Fresco is an executive producer.
Why We Probably Shouldn’t Let Our Excitement Get the Better of Us: Despite the cast’s valiant attempt to channel Zach Galifianakis and MODERN FAMILY’s Julie Bowen and Ty Burrell, MAN UP misses the mark.
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SUBURGATORY
According to the Official ABC Description:Single father George only wants the best for his 16-year-old daughter, Tessa. So when he finds a box of condoms on her nightstand, he moves them out of their apartment in New York City to a house in the suburbs. But all Tessa sees is the horror of over-manicured lawns and plastic Franken-moms. Being in the ‘burbs can be hell, but it also may just bring Tessa and George closer than they’ve ever been. Tessa (Jane Levy) and George (Jeremy Sisto) have been on their own ever since Tessa’s mom pulled a “Kramer vs. Kramer” before she was even potty trained. So far, George has done a pretty good job of raising Tessa without a maternal figure in their lives, but suddenly he’s feeling a little out of his league. So it’s goodbye New York City and hello suburbs. At first Tessa is horrified by the big-haired, fake-boobed mothers and their sugar-free Red Bull-chugging kids. But little by little she and her dad begin finding a way to survive on the clean streets of the ‘burbs. Sure, the neighbors might smother you with love while their kids stare daggers at your back, but underneath all that plastic and caffeine, they’re really not half bad. And they do make a tasty pot roast.
Why We’re Excited: KIDNAPPED’s Jeremy Sisto, SHAMELESS’ Jan Levy, WEEDS Allie Grant, FIREFLY’s Alan Tudyk, CURB YOUR ENTHUSIASM’s Cheryl Hines and SNL’s Ana Gasteyer… what’s not to love?
Why We Probably Shouldn’t Let Our Excitement Get the Better of Us: ABC give-ith… MR. SUNSHINE, BETTER WITH YOU, BETTER WITH TED…ABC take-ith away.
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